For Creative Expression

How To Figure Out What You Truly Want


When I was in high school I would compare myself to my class mates. I would say to myself “she is really creative“, “he is really awesome at playing the guitar” or “she is a really great writer” …What’s your thing Danika? What are you good at?

Looking back now, I put so much pressure on myself to figure it all out… You know figure out who I was meant to be for the rest of my life and what I was meant to do.

Sometimes people discover what they are truly passionate about earlier on in life and for some it takes longer, and that’s ok.

Unfortunately, many of us find ourselves at a stage in life where we’re struggling to identify what it is we truly want.

I always wanted to write, however I constantly compared myself to others and told myself I couldn’t and that I wasn’t good enough. So for a long time fear got in the way of me doing something I was incredibly passionate about.

“At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.”
Lao Tzu

So, I guess deep down we all know what we want…sometimes we’re scared and fearful we are going to fail, so we lock up our deepest desires and throw away the key, because it’s easier right?

Yes…But. When I got the courage to start writing Her Bright Ambition, I realised that I was standing at the beginning of something that I had insane bright faith in.

The feeling was like holy-cow, this is ahh-mazing, I can’t stop smiling, holy shit, yes yes, yes, oh my God!

And, my pen didn’t leave the paper for a while.

The power of being crystal clear of what you want and not letting your fear get in the way, is incredible.

So, be honest about what you want AND take consistent action to get what you want. The key is in finding clarity & courage.

Only we can decide who we want to be and what we want to do in our lives.

…No one else.

Look at your life as a blank canvas, only you can paint it with the colours you desire. You’re what makes you different.

It’s up to you to create an authentically empowered life that you adore. You just have to have the courage to live it.

Has your fear of failure or rejection got in the way of you unlocking one of your deepest desires? Share your story in the comments below.

Danika. xx

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  • Reply
    July 4, 2013 at 9:59 am

    Another insightful, motivating piece of writing Nikki!

    • Reply
      Danika Jane
      July 4, 2013 at 9:57 pm

      Thanks Kaitie!! Inspired by our chat on our girls night in :-) xx

  • Reply
    Kylie Ryan
    July 5, 2013 at 12:52 am

    You’re such an excellent, heartfelt writer Danika. I’m so glad to see you’ve found your groove! xx

    • Reply
      Danika Jane
      July 5, 2013 at 1:19 am

      Wow. Thanks so much Kylie. I’m loving it! xx

  • Reply
    Phillipa Kiripatea
    July 8, 2013 at 1:54 am

    Wow! You really spoke to me Danika. I was the same as you, always comparing myself to peers at school. It got to the point where at primary school I’d push myself to be better than my friends at the thing they were good at. Just because I wanted to better, not because I truly was passionate about it.
    But then I got to high school, and there were lots of kids good at lots of different things, and that’s where it truly hit me. “What the hell am I actually awesome at?” I couldn’t be the best at everything anymore because there were so many things to do, and so many people to compete with, so I stayed mediocre at things.
    Then move to now, I still don’t reeaaallly know what I’m awesome at, but I know I’m not (well most times) comparing myself to peers so that’s making the finding out process a lot easier.
    Thanks for bringing this all up for me Danika xxx

    • Reply
      Danika Jane
      July 8, 2013 at 2:15 am

      Thanks for your comment Phillipa & for sharing a bit about your story!! It’s nice to know I’m not the only one :). xx

  • Reply
    Davo aka Dad
    July 10, 2013 at 5:25 am

    Hi Nik
    A very inspiring piece of work Love you


    • Reply
      Danika Jane
      July 12, 2013 at 3:18 am

      Thanks for your unconditional support Dad!! xx

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